Women in Life Transitions
As a woman, you take on many different roles.
You’re a Caregiver. You care for and nurture your children and attend to the needs of other family members and friends – including those of your aging parents.
You’re a Life Partner. And, as such, you invest in growing this relationship – and work to communicate, collaborate, and compromise.
You’re a Professional. You pursue a career that demands your time and attention to flourish.
You’re a Breadwinner. And, perhaps, the primary breadwinner – responsible for your own tangible needs and those of your family.
You’re a Confidante. You provide a listening ear and emotional support for your children, life partner, friends, siblings, colleagues, and sometimes, even your parents.
You’re the Chief Cook and Bottle Washer of your household. You manage the finances, plan vacations, organize (and often execute) household repairs, assist with homework, design and prepare meals, kill spiders, clean the toilets, and mop the floors.
And YOU are an Individual.
A valuable, singular human being with your own personal needs, interests, and goals.
It’s no accident that you place yourself last on the list.
Even so, you have two more roles to play.
You also pride yourself in being a master multitasker and problem-solver. And you’re good at it.
But what happens when…
You’ve had too much on your plate for too long, you run out of steam, or life throws you a curve ball?
You stop carving out time to pay attention to who you are as an individual – that’s what happens.
Hell, it doesn’t even have to be a curve ball!
It could be a change or transition that you knew full well was coming and were looking forward to but, now that it’s here, you’re having trouble adjusting and keeping up.
Add depression and anxiety to the mix, and you’re off to the races, in the ABSOLUTELY WRONG DIRECTION.
Life happens, and change is inevitable.
You once looked forward to some of these changes and transitions – graduating college, becoming a homeowner, getting married, having children, re-entering the workforce.
Maybe you weren’t jazzed about the others, but you knew they were coming – sending your children off to college, aging, menopause.
But then there are those changes and transitions that you had no idea were coming, the ones that pulled the rug right out from under you and shook your world – illness, divorce, the loss of your job or a loved one.
Every change or transition, welcome or not, involves loss.
And you have to process and grieve these losses, so you can adjust, heal, and move forward.
Of course, this is often a lot easier said than done.
The expectation is that you can handle everything on your own – but who set that expectation?
Sometimes, you’re trying to live up to the unreasonable expectations of others.
And sometimes, it’s your own expectations of yourself that are unreasonable.
As a woman, you’ve fought hard for the right to be and do anything you choose.
But now, society expects you to be a super woman. To somehow be able to fulfill every role simultaneously – and to do it well – with only 24 hours in a day.
And, last time you checked, you hadn’t sprouted any additional limbs or heads and could still be in only one place at a time.
You have a million things to do – and you’re spread so thinly that, while they are all important, you’re not doing any of them particularly well.
What’s happened to your superpowers?
Anxiety, sadness, and inadequacy have become overwhelming, but…
You don’t want to complain.
You don’t want anyone to know you’re falling apart.
And, according to Facebook and Instagram, everyone else is enjoying a picture perfect life with a picture perfect partner, raising picture perfect children, going on picture perfect vacations, and living in a picture perfect home.
The more you see, the more you feel like a failure.
But you’re not. And you don’t have to go it alone.
Keeping everything to yourself breeds shame and creates a barrier between you and the support you so desperately need.
You continue to prioritize everyone else’s needs and wants ahead of your own, but maybe it’s time to take your turn at the top of the list.
Therapy can help you learn to prioritize your own needs and wants; it can help you process losses and transitions; and it can help heal your emotional wounds.
And, as an added benefit, you can better support and care for those you love when learning how to take care of yourself.
You deserve the care, compassion, and understanding that you always give to others.
You’re always there for everyone else. It’s time to let someone be there for you.
Contact me today (734) 263-6644 to schedule your free phone consultation!